Fish Tale

Looking out at the snow today, I’m experiencing a bit of cabin fever—feeling cooped up in the house and also pining for the little lakeside cabin my husband and I rented the past several summers. Just looking at the photos from those summer vacations makes me feel better.

It’s not all in my head. Research shows that merely viewing natural scenes may have a positive effect on mood, easing anger and anxiety. This alteration in mood may cause physiological changes, such as lowering blood pressure, which may buffer the effects of stress.

Back to memories of summers past . . . A funny thing happened last summer, so I wrote about it. Here’s my story.

Fish Tale

It’s our fifth annual summer vacation in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula. My husband and I are kayaking in our favorite spot: the Luce County wilderness on the Two Hearted River from the Reed and Green Bridge to Lake Superior. It’s a glorious day: sunny and 70.

Kayaking down the river, my husband occasionally lays his paddle across his kayak, allows his boat to float with the current, casts his line, and waits expectantly. Paddling and drifting for hours, he catches one good-sized trout and puts it on ice in a cooler.

Hungry, we stop for lunch. We land our kayaks on a sandy bank along a bend in the river. Wishing for at least one more trout for a decent fish dinner-for-two, my husband resumes casting as soon as he climbs out of his kayak, forgetting about lunch in his determination.

The trout breaks the water’s surface, leaping into the air. My husband reels in the line deftly, steering the fish away from the weeds and landing it safely on the sand. Success! He beams and bends to place the trout on ice beside the unfortunate other.

“The fish got sandy,” I say. “You should rinse it off in the river.” Holding the trout by its lower jaw, my husband bends over to wash the sand from its slippery skin. In a flash, the fish flips free, vanishing as if it never was. My husband and I look at each other. “No trout for you tonight,” he says.

Writing about it makes me feel better too.

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Not a Victim

Attending a self-defense class for women is the best thing I’ve done for myself lately.

The instructor, Robert Verdell, who is trained in self-defense, wrestling, dance and several forms of martial arts, believes that self-defense is one of the most important things for girls and women to learn. I agree—this point was made shockingly clear by the statistics Robert shared with the class. This is why he continues to offer the class, even though his aching body tells him it’s time to retire.

• Sexual assault continues to be the most rapidly growing violent crime in America.
• 1 in 3 American women will be sexually assaulted in her lifetime.
• 1 in 4 college women have either been raped or suffered attempted rape.
• Only 16% of rapes are ever reported to the police.
• 1 in 12 male students surveyed had committed acts that met the legal definition of rape; however, 84% said what they had done was definitely not rape.
• In a survey of college-aged males, 43% admitted to using coercive behavior to have sex, including ignoring a woman’s protest, using physical aggression, and forcing intercourse.
• In a survey of high school students, 56% of the girls and 76% of the boys believed forced sex was acceptable under some circumstances.

Much of the 3 ½ hours of class time involved real-life simulations of attacks. This may sound a bit intimidating, but it was very helpful and enlightening. It gave each of us in the class—there were nine—multiple opportunities to practice the techniques we were learning.

Because the simulations were as realistic as possible, I’m now aware of how I might react in such a situation and I know what I should practice and prepare for, both mentally and physically.

First of all, it’s important to project an un-victim-like confidence and a vigilant demeanor. We practiced other resistance techniques such as defying the perpetrator’s firm verbal and psychological actions by acting suspicious and rude. We also practiced immediately reacting to invasion of personal space and physical aggression by running, shouting and using various physical offense and defense tactics.

Many women are afraid to take a self-defense class. Consider this: Successful resistance of assault depends on overcoming fear and being determined not to be raped.

Note: Robert Verdell teaches women’s self-defense classes through Lansing Community College (weekend course) and Creative Wellness in East Lansing, Michigan.

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What’s Your Not-So-Superpower?

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 24, 2011

 

What’s Your Not-So-Superpower?

 

Even though each of us has at least one thing we’re good at, it’s human nature to dwell on the things we’re not so good at. As a result, the inadequate feelings about what we’re not so good at can overshadow and diminish the ability for us to shine.

A few years ago, I wrote a blog post, Play to Your Strengths. In a nutshell, I wrote about how fulfillment comes from discovering our strengths (see my post for one way to determine your character strengths) and engaging these strengths in everyday life whenever possible.

Unfortunately, I soon forgot about the wisdom reflected in that post and fell back into feeling bad about my “weaknesses” instead of playing to and building on my strengths.

That is, until I recently read this clever blog post, Discover Your Superpowers and Stop Obsessing about Your Kryptonite. The author, Josh Linkner, likens the talent or gift that each person possesses to the superpower of each superhero.

Linkner writes: “True heroes play to their strengths. They spend a disproportionate amount of time being the absolute best at a small number of things rather than trying to master every skill . . . Can you imagine Superman hunched over at the local saloon, unwilling to leap tall buildings because he’s bummed out over his one weakness? Instead, he’s identified his shortcomings and doesn’t let it hold him back. He’s learned to accept and avoid kryptonite so he can get on with saving the world.

Accepting the things I’m not so good at is the part of the equation I was missing. It’s only when I accept those things that I can let them be (allowing them to make me uniquely me) and turn my attention to nurturing and utilizing my superpowers—for good, of course.

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The Mindfulness Bell: A Tool for Awareness

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 20, 2011

 

The Mindfulness Bell: A Tool for Awareness

 

Rather than worrying about the future or mulling over the past, I am practicing staying in the present. It’s not easy! In fact, it’s much easier to get pulled into the “thought stream” of planning, worrying, remembering, regretting, and on and on.

Being in the present moment as much as possible is very important to me. I want to live my life (at least as many moments as possible) in the present, instead of being trapped inside my head, letting life slip by me unnoticed.

To remind myself throughout the day to come back to the present, to breathe and to pay attention to what is happening now, I’ve found the mindfulness bell incredibly helpful. On my laptop, I set the mindfulness bell to ring every 30 minutes (the timing is adjustable). I use it at work and when I’m working at home.

When it rings, I stop what I’m doing (putting aside the nagging thought that I’ll forget what I’m doing and not be able to get back to it—hogwash!), stretch a little, take three slow breaths; and take a few seconds to check in with my thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations. This entire process takes less than a minute. Then, I return to whatever I was doing before the bell rang.

I’ve found that these short interludes make a huge difference in my day. I’m more in touch with what is happening within me and around me. I’m more grounded, more relaxed and more peaceful.

In the book, Peace is Every Step, Thich Nhat Hanh, a Zen monk and spiritual leader, writes:

In my tradition, we use the temple bells to remind us to come back to the present moment. Every time we hear the bell, we stop talking, stop our thinking, and return to ourselves, breathing in and out, and smiling. Whatever we are doing, we pause for a moment and just enjoy our breathing . . . and get in touch with the wonders of life that are all around us—the flowers, the children, the beautiful sounds. Every time we get back in touch with ourselves, our conditions become favorable for us to encounter life in the present moment.

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Fresh is often best but processed can be practical

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 6, 2011

 

Fresh is often best but processed can be practical

 

Food Day—a day devoted to promoting healthy, affordable food produced in a sustainable, humane way—took place on October 24. I don’t know if the public took notice, but many nutrition professionals took offense.

That’s because Food Day promoters wish to encourage Americans to eat “real” food—which the promoters define as fresh fruits, vegetables and whole grains with an emphasis on farmer’s markets as the source—rather than highly-processed, overly-packaged food.

One registered dietitian wrote an article about her personal Food Day pledge, pointing out the elitism behind the Food Day premise. One of her points was to not “forget that most Americans do not live near a farmer’s market or other local source for year round produce. Frozen and canned vegetables are two of the best values in the grocery store.

Exactly. It’s time to get real about “real” food.

As Jennifer LaRue Huget reports in The Washington Postarticle, “Processed foods . . . can be good for you?” some processed foods “deliver lots of nutrition.” In the article, Connie Weaver, registered dietitian and head of the Department of Foods and Nutrition at Purdue University, says, “It is not a good recommendation to think people can have ‘fresh’ and ‘local’ foods meet all their nutrient needs.

Food may be fresh (fresh fruit), minimally processed (frozen fruit), and every level of processed up to highly processed (canned pie filling). Processing is anything that’s done to a food: grinding, baking, freezing, canning, bottling, adding vitamins and minerals, etc. Some forms of processing, such as pasteurization, help ensure food safety.

When considering which processed foods to purchase, the key is to choose (most often) those that are closest to the whole foods they came from. Weaver suggests checking the product label to see if a disproportionate amount of fat, sugar or salt has been added.

Here are some processed foods that are nutrient-rich and, therefore, smart choices: yogurt, canned beans, jarred spaghetti sauce, canned tomatoes, whole-grain pasta, oatmeal, popcorn, salmon and tuna in cans or pouches, peanut butter, frozen fruit, frozen vegetables, canned fruit (in fruit juice) and dried fruit.

Check out Cooking Light magazine’s 2011 list and 2010 listof the best processed and packaged foods. I’ll bet you’ll be really surprised.

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Home Food Safety Smarts

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 12, 2011

 

Home Food Safety Smarts

 

The recent listeria outbreak from cantaloupe brings to light the startling fact that many people are unaware of the proper way to store and prepare fruit—as well as other kinds of food.

Did you know you should wash your hands before and after handling cantaloupe? Not many people do. Did you know that cantaloupe should be washed immediately before using (but not prior) by rinsing and scrubbing it under water with a vegetable brush to ensure that soil is removed from the rind’s nooks and crannies? You might not.

It’s a good time to update our knowledge about home food safety. “Many of us learned food safety practices from our parents,” says Bethany Thayer, registered dietitian, director of wellness programs at Henry Ford Health System and spokesperson for the American Dietetic Association. “We know so much more now about food safety than 50 to 60 years ago.

Here’s a quick quiz to jumpstart your food safety smarts. For more tips and resources, visit the food safety Web sites below.

Questions

1. To remove bacteria from raw chicken, rinse the chicken under cold water. T or F

2. The best type of cutting board to reduce bacterial contamination is wood. T or F

3. Frozen meat, poultry or seafood should be thawed in the refrigerator. T or F

4. It’s okay to marinate raw meat, poultry or seafood at room temperature because the acid in the marinade kills any bacteria. T or F

5. Leftovers should be left out to cool before putting them in the refrigerator so that the refrigerator doesn’t have to work too hard. T or F

Answers

1. False. Rinsing raw chicken will only spread the bacteria to the sink and countertops. The only way to kill bacteria is to cook food to the proper internal temperature.

2. False. Wood, glass or plastic cutting boards are fine as long as they are kept clean and sanitized. Use separate cutting boards for raw meat and other food such as produce and bread. Cutting boards should be discarded when they become worn or develop hard-to-clean grooves.

3. True. Thawing on the counter or in the sink, even under running water, means that the food is in the temperature “danger zone” (40°F-140°F) where bacteria multiply quickly.

4. False. Bacteria grow very quickly at room temperature and the acid does not adequately inhibit it.

5. False. Leftovers should be placed in appropriate storage containers and refrigerated immediately so that they do not stay in the temperature “danger zone” (40°F-140°F). Large amounts of leftovers should be divided into multiple small containers so they will cool faster in the refrigerator.

For more information:

Home Food Safety

Food Safety

Fight Bac

Kitchen Safety, Part 1: Fridge & Freezer Tips

Kitchen Safety, Part 2: Thawing Foods

Kitchen Safety, Part 3: When in Doubt, Throw it Out!

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This Being Human

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 25, 2011

 

This Being Human

 

Not only can I not think of anything worth writing about, but I’m in a mood and want to spare you, dear reader, from the angst that will surely infect my writing.

So, instead of my biweekly blog post, I’ll share the wise words of Rumi, a 13th-century Sufi poet. I hope you enjoy the poem, “The Guest House”.

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

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Nip Picky Eaters in the Bud

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 11, 2011

 

Nip Picky Eaters in the Bud

 

Moms can be healthy role models for their children—before birth.
Research published in the journal Pediatrics indicates that what a mom eats and drinks while pregnant and/or breast feeding may influence their baby’s taste preferences.

The article and audio story about this research, “Baby’s Palate and Food Memories Shaped before Birth” is the most intriguing and encouraging information about kids and eating that I’ve come across in a long time.

Want your child to be a better food-taster and eater? Moms can help make this happen—eating games like “here comes the airplane” are not needed. Moms can help their baby accept certain foods just by eating those foods while pregnant and/or breastfeeding.

The amniotic fluid that surrounds a fetus in the womb is flavored by what the expectant mom consumes, be it a wide variety of foods from the five food groups or soft drinks and cigarettes. The flavors that the fetus is exposed to in the womb, and also through breastfeeding, are more likely to be accepted by the baby when it comes time to eat their first foods.

It’s a win-win situation: Both mom and baby enjoy a well-balanced diet. Also, baby is more apt to enjoy the foods that mom does, including the particular flavors of foods from that culture.

A child who enjoys a wide variety of food is more likely to get the nutrients they need for optimal growth and development.

The audio story notes that what a mom eats while pregnant and/or breastfeeding isn’t a guarantee that her child will like all the foods she likes.

Children’s food preferences are unique and fluctuate over time. It’s important for parents to continue to offer a wide variety of foods, including foods their children previously rejected—it often takes many exposures to a food before a child will try it. And they may never try it or like it. There may be several foods that a child never learns to like—and that’s okay. Eating a variety of foods will help fill in the gaps.

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Come On, Come Out

THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 1, 2011

 

Come On, Come Out

 

While spending nearly every day outdoors during a two-week vacation, kayaking, hiking and fishing in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula, I was struck by the stark contrast of living in nature compared to my usual existence.

How much of life has passed me by while I’ve subsisted indoors: doing, doing, doing.

During those lovely days by the lake, through the words of a poet and a teacher of meditation I discovered how I want to be (not do).

“Whatever peace I know rests in the natural world, in feeling myself a part of it, even in a small way.” –May Sarton

“As I go through all kinds of feelings and experiences in my journey through life—delight, surprise, chagrin, dismay—I hold this question as a guiding light: ‘What do I really need right now to be happy?‘ What I come to over and over again is that only qualities as vast and deep as love, connection and kindness will really make me happy in any sort of enduring way.” – Sharon Salzberg

It’s simple, really. Being with nature, and at the same time, being with those I love.

Listen: Come On Come Out by A Fine Frenzy

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Making a Bad Mood Better

SUNDAY, AUGUST 14, 2011

 

Making a Bad Mood Better

 

I’ve come to realize that a bad mood isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

After many years of trying to talk myself out of “bad” moods or chastising myself for having them (“I shouldn’t be feeling this way. What is wrong with me? This is ridiculous. I just need to snap out of it.”), I’ve found that “bad” moods stick around longer when I deny or resist them.

I feel better sooner when I recognize that I’m feeling sad or angry or disappointed, accept the feeling without judgment, not try to figure out why I’m feeling this way (that’s an exercise in futility, anyway) and relax into the feeling.

Basically, I allow myself to totally feel the feeling. It was scary at first, but the feeling didn’t overwhelm me, incapacitate me or kill me. And I was amazed at how quickly the feeling faded and disappeared.

In the May 2011 issue of Real Simple magazine, the column “Your Words” asked readers to respond to the question: How do you snap out of a bad mood? After what you’ve just read, you know that I believe trying to push away a bad mood actually makes the situation worse.

But I think the readers’ comments are great self-care tips if applied while sitting with a feeling and fully experiencing it or, even better, after doing so, instead of using the tips as a way to distract yourself from fully experiencing feelings.

One of my favorite ways to take care of myself is to spend time in the water whether it be swimming, kayaking, or taking a shower or bath.

Here are the replies from the Real Simple magazine readers:

  • Banging out a favorite tune on the drums improves my mood in a matter of minutes
  • Looking at bright colors makes me feel better: I put on a lemon yellow sweater or paint my nails neon orange
  • Blowing bubbles
  • I put on scented lotion and enjoy some aromatherapy
  • I close my office door and go into a sun-salutation yoga pose
  • A solo visit to a beauty supply store always does the trick
  • I whistle a happy tune
  • I sit on my porch and watch birds flutter around my feeders
  • I curl up in front of a movie based on a Jane Austen novel
  • I google “funny pugs”
  • In the midst of performing the dreariest task, such as painting the basement, I pop the cork and enjoy a glass of champagne
  • I gallop across a field on my horse
  • Writing letters to friends
  • Talking on the phone with my young grandchildren
  • I grab a friend who needs a few hours of relaxation and we head to the salon for pedicures

What’s your favorite way to treat yourself right?

 

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